Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Highlighters

It's pretty bad when people at work nickname you ANYTHING.  My *almost* decade of work experience has educated me to understand that people are very creative, and will use all readily available information about you - including your educational background, marital status, diet preferences, personal habits, and fashion sense to come up with some pretty accurate nicknames that perfectly capture your persona at work.

Personally, I know that I have been nicknamed by co-workers on several occasions - and anyone who works in an office environment and thinks they haven't been given a nickname is just fooling themselves.  The nicknames I know of are:

Clarice - Apparently I reminded someone of Jody Foster's character in Silence of the Lambs when I was trying like hell to keep up with some pretty messed up stuff going on at work and I had to have several conversations with people who were practically geniuses about the topic I was working on.  Despite the thoughts conjured up about working with a delusional cannibal, this nickname is actually my favorite.

Young Sarah - Which is pretty obvious - I work with a bunch of middle aged men and I (at the time) was a 20-something trying to figure it all out, and

Stompin' She-Beast - OK - this one was given within my first 2 years of employment, by a group of my peers, who had to listen to me moan and groan about all of the problems I was having with my boss.  At the time, I wasn't confident enough to approach him with my issues and develop a way to work around it.  So, instead, I would let my frustrations build up to the point of explosion then go to lunch with "friends" and let it all out - apparently with LOTS of GUSTO!



I'm sure there have been other, probably more heinous nicknames that I have no idea about.  Ones that are given by people who work with me regularly and get glimpses of my personality and work ensembles, then sum me up with 1 or 2 words that they whisper to their closest work friends when I walk into or out of meetings.  I know I've done exactly that with several people I work with - so it's only fair to assume it's being done to me.

Since I find them so amusing, here's a few sample nicknames I've used at work:




Boots the Monkey - Given to a professional woman who was partially responsible for snow removal operations at a large transportation facility.  During one particularly dreadful snow event, this woman showed up for work in boots something like these.  And she wants to be taken seriously!














Sho' Nuff - Given to a particularly arrogant boss who always got "crazy eyes" and an attitude of self-righteousness when he was giving staff directions or trying to motivate people to do their jobs.  He looked kind of like this guy.  Yikes!






Highlighter - Given to a young intern who thought it was a good idea to wear bright, bright, bright shirts...AND shoes...AND stockings...to work.  When this person walked by, even at great distances, your eyes couldn't help but be distracted by all the neon.  When ALL this yellow walks past you, it's hard not to want to open a book and start marking it up!






I could go on, but I think I've been inappropriate enough with this post as is.  What are some of your favorite nicknames?

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